Saturday, November 26, 2011

Clearing the spider webs

Alright. Now i feel like I want to vent out briefly. Ready to throw the burden of my chest and move on cheerfully towards the positive things that are coming my way inshAllah.

I got backstabbed by those who were closest to me. it was verbally brutal and I have justified the fact that they probably didn't mean to hurt me but the damage was done, they hurt my mother. They have betrayed my trust and overthrew my kindness and that of my family. I do not hate them though. No. I am merely disappointed by their venomous reaction when I have confronted them with civility. Then again perhaps that's human nature when they are caught in a corner.
While others would gloat about hurting those who hurt them I decided to reach out to them in Eid by wishing them Eid Mubarak, thinking that maybe since it's not only a time of celebration but a time of mending things and clearing hearts. Sadly this individual probably didn't see it that way.  Then I tried to give it a shot 2 last times (third time my mother advised me to reach out just to clear my conscious) for the sake to end it with civility since I cannot bring myself to welcome this individual like I used to, with an open heart, mind and soul.
Sadly no response. So I decided to move on, for this person carried too much venom towards me and I have no room for that in my life.
After clearing my mind from all the negativity and returning from Italy all I have is disappointment and the question 'why'. Why speak ill about me and my family? What right did this person have when my family and I welcomed them with such sincerity.

Anyways I might never know the true answers behind that individuals choice to speak about me and my family. But I have made a decision. Yes I am human and I am disappointed and cannot bring myself to have this person back in my life. But I am a muslim and I will forgive this individual.


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